I’ve been meaning to write this post for a few days now — but only now am finding the right words, and the right time, to write it.
…remember back at the start of this year — when I proclaimed 2012 to be my year of ‘no limits’?
Let’s revisit that, shall we?
An excerpt from that post…
In looking forward to 2012, rather than listing out 3 or 4 resolutions or goals for 2012, I have made just one promise to myself.
To leap before looking.
Breaking free of any preconceived limitations or boundaries that maybe existed in my mind before.
…26.2? Sure, let’s do it.
…a new job? Lemme at it (a post for another day, promise).
…seeing just how refined this body can become, barre n9ne-style — All.Over.It.
…harnessing my inner sponteneity, letting go of that pre-planned/go-go-go mentality…finding that Type B?I want it.
So this is me – staring down 2012 with a sparkle in my eye: I’m ready to leap without looking. I’m ready to have no limits today...everyday.
And now, it’s mid-October….10 months later — and I’m firmly entrenched in what I can only describe is the year where I crushed boundaries and harnessed that ‘no limits’ mantra in everything I’ve done.
— 26.2? Done. Trained with all my heart, and ran my butt off with Scott, #teamsutera style all the way. Goal: crushed.
— Barre n9ne and seeing how much more refinement I could eek out, post-60 day challenge? Refined…sure, but more than that? I’ve proudly transformed into an instructor this year. An instructor who *loves* this job more than ever (hmm…make that three new jobs this year…)
— Embracing sponteneity, tossing aside that Type A mentality a little bit this year? I’ve had no choice but to let go of structure and pre-conceived boundaries this year, like whoa. (Learning to roll with it as best as this Type A-er can ‘roll’ with anything)
On the one hand? I’m damn proud of what this year has evolved into for me.
…yet on the other? I’m damn tired.
Everyone keeps asking me what’s next, what’s next, what’s next for me, for us, for #teamsutera. Are we signing up for another 26.2? Are we tackling some new, as yet undefined challenge next? What are we gonna DO now that this marathon is behind us and this year of ‘no limits’ is quickly drawing to a close.
Honestly? I just want to be.
(“just be…Jess” as Melissa told me in a note last night…boy did she hit the nail on the head or what?)
So what this means I’m not quite sure. I just know that I need to simplify my life. Somehow. Some way. I have no idea what this means yet. But you bet your ass it’s the only thing on my mind right now.
Striving for excellence not perfection.
These are the phrases rolling around in my head.
…I’m not longer so focused on ‘no limits.’
…honestly, it’s time to just be. In whatever shape or form that takes.